id be glad to
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
