If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
