i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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