i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
