I hope mine doesn't look like that
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Are we still banned from the library?
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize