Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize
