I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
You're like the curious george of whores
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
