Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
