Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize