I wish you could order shots online.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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