i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Randomize
