I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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