You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize