I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
