It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
