What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize