We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
