Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
