if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize
