Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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