I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
No subtext here. People are naked.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Randomize