I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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