Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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