it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
