I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
