So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Randomize
