when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
