Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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