4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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