Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
