So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
