Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
