I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
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