we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
