if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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