So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
