uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
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