as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Randomize
