so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize