Got a toothbrush?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize