I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
