Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Is her dick bigger than yours?
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Randomize
