Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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