think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize
