Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
