For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
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