Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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