Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
