i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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