i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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