you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Randomize
